Steps:
Harvest regularly. For each of these methods, always check regularly. If you can, pick green tomatoes that have a tinge of color at the blossom end and feel a little softer than the solid young fruits. If you pick them any earlier than this, they will not have matured and thus will not ripen at all. Cook immature green tomatoes as is.

If you’re not sure whether your green tomatoes are mature, cut a questionable tomato in half–if it has yellowish interiors and jelly-like or sticky tissue, it is mature enough to ripen. Obviously, the one that you cut in half won’t ripen, but observing how it looks on the outside will give you an idea of what to look for with green tomatoes on the vine.

If you know there’s a frost coming that will ruin all of the tomatoes, don’t pick individual tomatoes; lift the entire plant out of the ground, making sure that some roots are still attached. Shake off as much dirt as you can and hang it upright in a dry, sheltered location, such as the garage. Avoid extremes (direct sunlight, total darkness). The tomatoes will still ripen almost as well as they would have on the vine.
Before storage, always remove vines, twigs, stems, leaves etc. that might rub on other tomatoes and cause damage during the ripening process. If the tomatoes are dirty, wash them gently first and allow to air dry before trying to ripen them.

Use one of the techniques outlined below to store and ripen the tomatoes off the vine.
Keep an eye out for decay or mold. If you see any, remove the affected tomatoes immediately and give the tomatoes more air circulation. The cooler the storage area for the tomatoes, the longer the ripening process. Expect about 2 weeks for ripening under normal, warm household conditions. If the house or storage area is too cold, the tomatoes may never ripen or will result in flavourless tomatoes.
Jar method – For a few tomatoes

Assemble the jars.
Remove the lids.
Put in one ripening banana per jar.
Put in two to four medium-sized green tomatoes per jar. Do not overfill the jar, or the tomatoes might bruise.
Screw on lid tightly.
Leave in a warm, semi-humid place, out of direct sunlight. Check regularly – if your banana starts to rot before the tomatoes are ready, remove it and replace with a new banana. This method should leave you with ripened tomatoes within one – two weeks.
Cardboard box method – For many tomatoes

Prepare a cardboard box. If possible, add some foam or fruit cardboard in the base; or simply line with newspaper.
Place a layer of tomatoes in the box, each one next to the other. If you have a lot of tomatoes, a second layer on top is okay but be gentle. Do not make any more than two layers in case you bruise the fruit at the base.
Add some ripening bananas if you’d like. The tomatoes are likely to ripen anyway, as they release their own ethylene and influence each other. However, using bananas will help to speed up the process.
Place in a cool, slightly humid room away from light. A pantry shelf is ideal if you have one.
Plastic bag method – For a few or many tomatoes

Assemble plastic bags. Punch a few “air circulation” holes in each bag you are going to use.
Place 3 – 4 tomatoes with 1 banana in each bag. Depending on the size of your bag, you may be able to add more (or perhaps less). Be guided by the size of the bag, tomatoes and banana.
Store in a warm, semi-humid area away from direct sunlight.
Paper bag method – For a few tomatoes

Open paper bag and insert ripening banana and amount of tomatoes as will fit.
Store in a warm, semi-humid area away from sunlight.
This method is useful where you don’t have a lot of room and you only have a few tomatoes.

They needed to show every woman and man
That they were the brainiest brains in the land
Then the thought came to them, in this meeting they made
They thought up a problem, a goal, a crusade
They heard that some students off some beaten path
Were failing at reading, science and math.

Not all of our students in schools did succeed
They all didn’t get A’ed, B’ed or even C’ed
Some students had stumbled, some had just failed
“How could this happen?” The Thinkers all wailed
They got up their dander, they got up their guff
“We won’t accept failure, Enough! Enough!”

“We will fix this dilemma,” they said with a grin
They made failure unlawful, illegal……..a sin
They demanded achievement, they ordered success
They set higher standards and made up big tests
The tests were mandated for one and for all
And they published the scores for each school, large and small

But they found that some students still didn’t excel
And the mandated testing showed things still weren’t swell
They looked at some subgroups to measure the flaws
(The problem certainly wasn’t the laws!)
Gender and Races, Disability and Creeds
Poverty, Religion, which kids are knock kneed

Dozens of subgroups, some large, some small
And one (Pacific Islanders) had no students at all
They tested the students in grades 11, 8 and 4
They ordered more testing…..and more….and more!
Some kids were embarrassed and some were ashamed
But the Thinkers insisted the schools were to blame!

We’ll punish the teachers; we’ll fire the boss
That old failing Principal isn’t much of a loss
Then we’ll order improvements, we’ll order reforms
‘Til all of those students exceed National norms
They expected things to get done yesterday
Without any guidelines or any local say

Now the end of this story will come in a while
When all of the standards are met by each child
And every student can write like Thoreau
Do calculus, trig and read like a pro
Speak several languages, know history well
Understand physics and think chemistry is swell

But for now we will struggle with NCLB
With consequences the Thinkers didn’t foresee
The problems with funding, where is the support
Who is highly qualified and who is a dork?
And the biggest question with NCLB
If no one can fail, how can anyone succeed?

I have sought help.  I took a summer course in technology for beginners and an adult evening course (MAC for Dummies)….twice.  Still, I am not a technology geek, by any stretch of the imagination.  This is a sensitive area for me when my co-educators often joke that I am technology disabled. 

On the first in-service day of this year, one of my high school teachers, Dave (not his real name) said to me “When are you going to learn how to use e-mail?  When you get a message that was sent to multiple people, you always e-mail your reply to everyone on the list.  There is a simple “reply to sender” logo.” 

I was quick to answer, “Well, I used to do that, but not any more.  I now only “reply to sender”.  This made all of my teachers laugh hysterically (although they laughed at me with a lot of respect) and I knew they were not believing me.  So I said, “Alright, the next time I send a multiple reply, I will bring you a pie”.  “Oh Boy” they shouted.  Dave said “Make it raspberry”.

Now the very next morning I was reading my e-mail and I had one from the Technology Systems Analyst.  He wanted to remind all of us to send all requests for assistance through his helpdesk.    I sent a reply, assuring him that I would “get with the program”.

Now Jane (not her real name), my technologically gifted secretary, comes into my office and tells me that I sent the reply to everyone at Brewer High School. Oh s*#t.  I owe Dave a pie.  I grab my checkbook and race to the bank.  I drive up to the window and put my check in the little plastic canister and shoot it into the building.  Money comes magically shooting back and I removed it from the canister.  But when I try to put it back, I drop it on the ground and it rolls under my truck.  I can’t open the door (too close) so I drive ahead to……crunch!  I ran over the canister.  It is a pile of plastic shards.  I park and run back, stopping the car following me, so I can clean up the mess.  I carry the broken pieces into the bank and wait in line for a teller.

 When it is my turn to go to the window, all of the tellers and customers break into loud laughter.   “I guess I ran over your canister” I say with a pained expression.

 “You going to pay for that?”  asks one of the tellers.  I ask her how much and she slowly answers, “I don’t know, Mr. Priest.  No one has ever run over one before”.

Now I get the pie and return to dear old BHS as fast as I can, hoping to pay off Dave before anyone else finds out.  Jane, seeing me return, says “You’d better look at your e-mail, first!”

 I open my system and, sure enough, I have 7 e-mails.  I open each one slowly, reading one after another request for a pie.  Apple, blueberry, butterscotch….they all think that the deal included them, not just Dave.  Before I can respond to all 7, I have 5 more.  There is a pattern, here.  They started in the Special Ed. Pod, worked across to the Science Department, Social Studies next, up the south wing of Brewer High.  Pecan pie, lemon meringue, deep dish apple…..we hit the main office and round the corner, headed for the Student Services Center.  Dutch apple, Boston cream, strawberry rhubarb, the orders keep coming.  Down the North wing through English and Math, more pies are being ordered.  I can’t keep up with reading the e-mails, let alone respond to them.

Someone in Guidance orders a blueberry cheesecake and sends it cc’d to all 278 district employees.  The e-mail pie-epidemic has broken out of Brewer High.  When I replied to that request (when did I promise cheesecake?) I accidentally sent it to all 278 employees.  Now I am getting e-mails from teachers telling me what they want for a second pie.

I give up and walk down to the Special Ed. Office, ready to face the humiliation in person.  Dave (still not his real name) is talking to three laughing teachers in the hall.  As I approach, I hear him say (loudly) “and he runs over the canister!”  I walk up to the hysterical quartet.  This 45 year-old man is flapping his arms and jumping up and down like a 3 year-old who can’t wait to pee.  “This is the best first day of school I ever had!” he shouts.

I enter the Special Ed. Office, honestly trying to stay business-like.  Raspberry pie remains are everywhere.  One teacher, Jody (not her real name), hands me two blank envelopes. “ These are the only e-mails you can use from now on.”  Oh……har, har, har.

Later that evening I was telling my brother Ken (not his real name) what had happened.  Then I said “These things must happen to everyone.  Tell me it isn’t just me.”

“It is just you”, Ken answered.  “You are the Cosmo Kramer of  Special Education!”

Actually this video was our 2008 YouTube Sketchies II contest entry. While we didn’t win the $20,000 prize, we did have fun creating the video. The kids were totally into it, and each played a part in whole process. From the script to the scene edits, we worked together and had a great time. We will be sure to take another stab at the Sketchies III contest. The real prize will be the time we spend together building memories that we can look back on. Of course $20,000 would be great too.

Let us begin by answering some of your most common questions.

Q. What is “Assistive Technology”?
A. It’s expensive.

Q. No, I mean, what does it consist of?
A. It’s technical.

Q. Well, how am I supposed to fmd out what I am expected to buy for my students?
A. You are supposed to hire an Assistive Technology consultant to help you

Q. What is an Assistive Technology Consultant?
A. He is expensive.

Many of you have questions about specific “hard¬ware” that you are considering, for instance:

Q. I recently purchased a MAC 575 with modem, fax card, scan capability and voice input. The geek down the hall said.he got a Super MAC PLUS. What did he get that I dido’t get? 
A. He got everything you got plus a large drink and fries. 

Q. How can I add Super Mega K to my IBM PC Clone?
A. Ream out the cylinders to 9OMM, add an overhead cam, dual carbs and spoilers, glass pack your pipes and paint the body candy apple red.

Q. Are you s.ure you’re talking about computers?
A. Are you sure I’m not? ….

The Division is now getting into technology in a big way. By using an “Automated Voice Response System” (AVRS) Division staff can avoid frustrating local administrators when consultants are not available for a phone consult. Recently, I called Con¬sultant Bob with a due process question and got “Into” AVRS.

Me: Can I speak to Bob, please?
AVRS: This is AVRS Bob, ready to assist you.
If you wish to file a complaint for investigation, press “1″ NOW!
If you wish to request a Due Process Hear¬ing, press “2″ NOW!
If you wish information on fIling a complaint with the Office of Civil Rights, press “3″ NOW!
If you wish to call your local Director a Nazi Gestapo Chowderhead, press “4″ NOW!

And the technology in Augusta can now be linked to the technology in your local school, These sophisticated computers can “talk” to each other (digitally, of course) and can conduct routine business without the need to tie up valuable administrator time. For instance just listen to this conversation between a computer in Augusta and our counterpart computer in Brewer.

Augusta Com: Our data banks indicate that you have missed filing multiple annual, EF S 272′s.
Brewer Com: What-AT?

Augusta Com: 272′s – your “Documentation of Justification for Waiver of Previous Documentation Report.”
Brewer Com: Right when is it due?

Augusta Com: Remember Jimmy Carter?
Brewer Com:Ooooh, what do you recommend?
Augusta Com: Pull your EF S 284′s ”The Reductant Information Waiver of Reductant fuformation Report” from any year from ’88. through ’93 and recode it all to the 272. Works every time.

Brewer Com: What if our AdminIstrators uncover this?
Augusta Com: Our Administrators?

Brewer Com: It’s done. Thanks dude.
Augusta Com: Is this a great system or what?

Incredibly, all of this takes roughly .00162 seconds. It would take our most capable administrators hours to fabricate this amount of information!

Some future thinking planners expect that by the year 2000, local schools will be submitting more data in more formats to Augusta that we will even be able to become aware of, let alone read, study or discuss, dictating the need for much more sophisticated equip¬ment to monitor and report on this new information.

The need for more “hardware” to “read”, “file” and “match” this data will outweigh the need for consultants who are much slower and more prone to error. Budgets Will need to be planned accordingly. It is not inconceivable to imagine a Division of Special Services that is one big machine – Special Com – with “consultant” computers linked for specific purposes (Due Process Com, SERT Com, Out-of-District Com, etc.)

This trend may be threatening to many of our current administrators. If you are concerned about your future with this new trend toward technology, you may want to consider contracting for services from an Assistive Technology Administrator Consultant.

Q. What is an Assistive Technology Administrative Consultant?
A. I’m expensive.

“Yes” the boy said “but just a little bit.” He looked at her with a very sad face and asked “Are you mad at me?”

“No” she answered, ”I’m not mad at you. In fact, I am going to make brownies tonight and I will bring you some tomorrow.”

“You will?”

“Yes, I am going to need flour, sugar, cocoa, milk, and dog poop.”

“You are going to put dog poop in my brownies?” he asked.

“Yes, but just a little bit.”

You might be able to catch Keith and Canaan on our Maine webcam. Be sure to check it out often, as you never know what you might see.

I have had an on going prescription of Allegra D for three or four years now. I don’t think it ever really worked for me, plus I never really liked the idea of having to take a medication every day, so I never really kept up with it. After checking things out and speaking with me for a minute or two, my Doctor pulled up his laptop and said, “hey, I want to show you something”. I guess it’s a sign on the times when your doctor fires up YouTube while in the middle of and appointment. Below is the video he showed me.

If this is the first time you have seen this you are probably thinking the same thing I did. “Man that does not look like fun at all” I instantly flashed back to my younger days when I was learning to water ski and had experienced several forceful nasal flushes. My Doctor proceeds to tell me that he has been doing this sinus and nasal flush for several months and it worked for him. At this point I was ready to try anything different, as I was not looking forward to the Allegra D and I liked the idea of this being a natural (well sort of) solution.

I went home and started looking for my Neti Pot. Sure my doctor told me I could get one at himalayaninstitute.org, but being the frugal shopper that I am, I figured I would check around. I ended up finding Neti Pots all over the place, but I ordered one from Amazon for $12.00.

I have been using the Neti Pot once a day for just over a month and can honestly say it has made a difference for me. The sensation is a little strange at first, but it sort of grows on over time. While I can’t say that I am cured from all sinus issues, I can say so far this has been a better solution for me than taking medication every day. If you suffer from nasal congestion and sinus issues, it’s worth the $12.00 to try the Neti Pot. You can purchase salt to use with it; however I simply use kosher salt. Be sure to follow the directions closely so the water does not go down your throat. Adding the appropriate amount of salt will also help reduce any discomfort.